I am worth a lot!

In a brief conversation, a man asked a woman he was pursuing the question...... "What kind of man are you looking for?" She sat quietly for a moment before looking him in the eye and asking. "Do you really want to know?" Reluctantly, he said, "Yes."
She began to expound... As a woman in this day and age, I am in a position to ask a man what he can do for me that I can't do for myself. I pay my own bills. I take care of my household without the help of any man. I am in the position to ask, "What can you bring to the table?"
The man looked at her. Clearly he thought that she was referring to money.
She quickly corrected his thought and stated, " I am not referring to money. I need something more." I need a man who is striving for perfection in every aspect of life." He sat back in his chair, folded his arms, and asked her to explain.
She said, " I am looking for someone who is striving for perfection mentally because I need conversation and mental stimulation. I don't need a simple-minded man. I am looking for someone who is striving for perfection spiritually because I don't need to be unequally yoked... believers mixed with unbelievers is a recipe for disaster. I need a man who is striving for perfection financially because I don't need a financial burden. I am looking for someone who is sensitive enough to understand what I go through as a woman , but strong enough to keep me grounded. I am looking for someone who I can respect. In orderto be submissive, I must respect him. I cannot be submissive to a man who isn't taking care of his business. I have no problem being submissive...he just has to be worthy. God made woman to be a helpmate for man. I can't help a man if he can't help himself . "
When she finished her spill, she looked at him. He sat there with a puzzled look on his face. He said, "You're asking a lot."
She replied, " I'm worth a lot."

“Jesus, I love you like an octopus”

My six-year old amazes me with her ability to connect to things she sees around.

Diya does an extempore prayer at our family prayer time while I stick to my routine recitation from the prayer book. She has her list of complaints (predominantly about Mamma being unfair with restricted TV viewing and control on visit to her friends’ flats), which comes after a thanking session for every good thing (in her terms) on that day with display of smiley and star she earned in her notebook, paintings made by her, chocolate wrappers etc. She ends the prayer with ‘Thank you Jesus, Thank you Lord’ and the concluding part more or less remained consistent and predictable.

Yesterday, Diya was in a real good mood to pray after her preparation for catechism exam. The thanking and complaining sessions were lengthier than usual. The surprise came in the end. She concluded the session with ‘Thank you Jesus, Thank you Lord, I love you like an octopus’. Clueless of what she meant of loving like an octopus, I sought instant gratification of my doubt. “Amma, it is because octopus has 3 hearts, and with 3 hearts octopus can love much more than a human being with 1 heart”

Well, that sounded quite reasonable.

contemporary face of Onam

Onam is celebrated by Keralites as the home coming of Mahabali, the king under whose rule ‘all men were equal, no one was poor and there was no theft or dread of thieves’. The sales figures of alcoholic beverages in the State during the season yet again proved parity among people with rich and poor contributing to a whopping 135 crore sales revenue by both Beverages Corporation and Consumer fed in a single week.

The Communist Government in the State may see this as a step towards achieving their Socialist objectives.

I got this humble thought of a typical ‘Onappookkalam’ using flowers getting replaced with a contemporary ‘kalam’ which depicts the meaning of Onam (more appropriately) such as this one in the coming years when I saw this picture forwarded by a friend.

inky pinky ponky...

There are issues we discuss over and over again, often overshooting the scheduled time of meetings, extending the work week to Saturdays, still not succeeding in reaching a decision. The work plan I make for the week goes into doldrums when I spend a major part of the business day in conference rooms.

I am impressed with Diya, my 6-year old daughter taking instantaneous decisions effortlessly with the tough situations of her age.

She has 2 GEMS, pink and green. Which one to eat first..inky pinky ponky...

She has to read the English Reader and practice writing Hindi words for dictation. She hates to do both. She coaxes Mamma to compromise with one of those for the day and Mamma wants her to choose between the two... inky pinky ponky...

boxing, olympics and more..

Boxing has never been an interesting soprt to me. In the first place, I thought that those punches are inhuman and belong to a primitive age. Sights of blood drippng from boxing rings made me switch channels when I chanced to have glimpse of this sport on TV.

My mental block is partly attributed to association of this sport with Mike Tyson, famous for his off the Ring activities with a chain of criminal records to beat any sportsman the history has seen given the fact that the only two names I can recollect are that of Muhammed Ali and Mike Tyson with my limited knowledge of this sport.

It was a revelation to me that this sport is not about muscle power, but tactics. I could not have thought I would become a great fan of this sport I'm today, and Virendar, Jitendar and Akhil, my heroes!!

I enjoy the sport despite knowing the rules of the game primarily because it brought the sheen of a Olympic medal to India, a non-performer of all times whose only intention appears to save its face with a bronze or sliver from the risk of being counted among the countries at the bottom of the medal tally, which are either too small to send a decent delegation to Olympics or just waking up to modern civilisation.

The way these boys have come up with their humble social background achieveing success through their sheer hardwork and dedication with minimal support from the system talks about where India has to begin its efforts.

If one Thomas Master in Koruthode (a remote village in Kerala) can produce 3 Olympians (Anju Boby George, Shiny Wilson & Jincy Philip) and many athletes of national repute,(http://www.outlookindia.com/mad.asp?fname=Making&synopsis=&subsubsec=Kerala&fodname=20051024&personname=K.P.+Thomas) it is a testimony that we can do a better a job with a concerted effort in finding talent and providing training and environment to grow them.

Is there a point is expecting a sportsperson to practice 8 or 12 hours a day to excel in his sports and bring Olympic glory, when he has to fight for his and his family's sustenance? This becomes the role of the system (read as government) to provide this along with infrastructure and training facilities for sports.

driving in India

Another interesting e-mail forward.. You'll enjoy every bit of it if you have experienced the traffic in Bangalore.

The Dutch Software Company, BAAN has opened an office in Hyderabad and has been bringing in some of their staff from the Netherlands to work in India. This is an article written about the driving conditions in India by Coen Jeukens, functional Architect for BAAN.

For the benefit of people visiting India and daring to drive on Indian roads, I offer a few hints for survival. This is applicable to every place in India except Bihar, where life outside a vehicle is only marginally safer. Indian Road rules broadly operate within the domain of Karma where you do your best and leave the results to your insurance company.

So here are the driving hints:
Do we drive on the left or right of the road? The answer is "both". Basically you start on the left side of the road, unless it is occupied. In that case, go to the right, unless that is also occupied. Then proceed by occupying the next available gap, as in chess. Just trust your instincts, ascertain the direction, and proceed. Most drivers don't drive, but just aim their vehicles in the intended direction.

Don't you get discouraged or underestimate yourself. Except for a belief in reincarnation, the other drivers are not in any better position.

Don't stop at pedestrian crossings just because some fool wants to cross the road. You may do so only if you enjoy being bumped in the back. Pedestrians have been strictly instructed to cross only when traffic is moving slowly or has come to a dead stop because some minister is in town. Still, some idiot may try to wade across, but then, let us not talk ill of the dead.

Blowing your horn is not a sign of protest as in some countries where we honk to express joy, romance or just bare lust (two brisk blasts). Here, it may be to show your resentment, frustration, or just to mobilize a dozing cow in the middle of the bazaar.

Keep informative books in the glove compartment. You may read them during traffic jams, while awaiting the chief minister'smotorcade, or waiting for the rain waters to recede.

Night driving on Indian roads can be an exhilarating experience. The roads do not have shoulders, only occasional boulders.

Truck Drivers are the James Bonds of India and are licensed to kill.

Often you may encounter a single powerful beam of light about six feet above the ground. This is not a super motorbike, but a truck approaching you with a single light on; usually the left one. It could be the right one, but never get too close to investigate. You may end up proving your point posthumously.

During the daytime, trucks are more visible, except that the drivers will never signal. Often you will observe that the cleaner who sits next to the driver, will project his hand and wave hysterically.

Occasionally you might see what looks like a UFO with blinking coloured lights and weird sounds emanating from within. This is an illuminated bus, full of happy pilgrims singing bhajans. These pilgrims go at breakneck speed, seeking contact with the Almighty and often meeting with success.

I must add a positive point also. Rash and fast driving in residential areas has been prevented by providing a "speed breaker" which is two for each house. This mound, incidentally, covers the water and drainage pipes for that residence and is left untarred for easy identification by the corporation authorities, should they want to recover the pipe for year-end accounting.

Good Luck and God be with you!

ant and grasshopper

A satirical attribute to the plight of Indian soceity... I saw this e-mail forward doing rounds and thought it merits a post.

U.S Version
Ant & Grasshopper :
The Ant works hard in the withering heat all summer building its house and laying up supplies for the winter.
The Grasshopper thinks the Ant is a fool and laughs & dances & plays the summer away.
Come winter ,the Ant is warm and well fed.
The Grasshopper has no food or shelter so he dies out in the cold.

INDIAN Version:
The Ant works hard in the withering heat all summer building its houseand laying up supplies for the winter.
The Grasshopper thinks the Ant's a fool and laughs & dances & plays the summer away.
Come winter, the shivering Grasshopper calls a press conference and demands to know why the Ant should be allowed to be warm and well fed while others are cold and starving.
NDTV, BBC, CNN show up to provide pictures of the shivering Grasshopper next to a video of the Ant in his comfortable home with a table filled with food.
The World is stunned by the sharp contrast.
How can this be that this poor Grasshopper is allowed to suffer so?
Arundhati Roy stages a demonstration in front of the Ant's house.
Medha Patkar goes on a fast along with other Grasshoppers demanding that Grasshoppers be relocated to warmer climates during winter.
Amnesty International and Koffi Annan criticizes the Indian Government for not upholding the fundamental rights of the Grasshopper.
The Internet is flooded with online petitions seeking support to the Grasshopper (many promising Heaven and Everlasting Peace for prompt support as against the wrath of God for non-compliance).
Opposition MPs stage a walkout.
Left parties call for "Bharat Bandh"in West Bengal and Kerala demanding a Judicial Enquiry.
CPM in Kerala immediately passes a law preventing Ants from working hard in the heat so as to bring about equality of poverty among Ants and Grasshoppers.
BJP wants Sonia Gandhi's apology.
Lalu Prasad allocates one free coach to Grasshoppers on all Indian Railway Trains, aptly named as the 'Grasshopper Rath'.
Finally, the Judicial Committee drafts the 'Prevention of Terrorism Against Grasshoppers Act' [POTAGA], with effect from the beginning of the winter.
Arjun Singh makes 'Special Reservation' for Grasshoppers in Educational Institutions & in Government Services.
The Ant is fined for failing to comply with POTAGA and having nothing left to pay his retroactive taxes, it's home is confiscated by the Government and handed over to the Grasshopper in a ceremony covered by NDTV.
Arundhati Roy calls it 'A Triumph of Justice'.
Lalu calls it 'Socialistic Justice'.
CPM calls it the 'Revolutionary Resurgence of the Downtrodden'.
Koffi Annan invites the Grasshopper to address the UN General Assembly.
…………………
Many years later...
The Ant has since migrated to the US and set up a multi-billion dollar company in Silicon Valley ..
100s of Grasshoppers still die of starvation despite reservation somewhere in India ....
As a result of loosing lot of hard working Ants and feeding the Grasshoppers, India is still a developing country!!!.

I am not of the opinion that public sector is not contributing to the Indian economy. But, the Sixth Pay Commission proposal, if implemented, will worsen the fiscal situation which is already in a bad shape with a huge farm loan waiver. If Government thinks that private sector is a key contributor to the economy and it needs to thrive, it should stop exploiting the private sector.